A man woke up every morning and passed gas. After
about eight or nine years of marriage, his wife
finally said, if you fart any more, you’ll fart
your guts out. Being a butcher, the wife decided
to put pig scraps in his pants so he would wake up,
and not do it anymore. She put the scraps in his
pants that night. He woke up in the morning and went
across the hall to the bathroom. Two long hours later,
he came out and stated, honey, you were right about
me farting my guts out BUT WITH THE GRACE OF THE DEAR
LORD AND THESE TWO FINGERS. I GOT THEM BACK IN THERE.