Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,
“I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink
whatever comes out?” 

Who was the first person to say, “See
that chicken there? I’m gonna eat the next thing that comes
outta its butt.”

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
song about him?
 
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a radio out
of coconut, why can’t he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get
undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They’re both dogs!

What do you call male ballerinas?
Can blind people see their dreams?
 
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If
corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables,then

what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come
from morons?

Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
have the same tune?
 

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the
hemisphere, but call a hemorrhoid when it’s in your ___?