Last week I took some friends out to a restaurant, and noticed
a hat the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It
seemed a little strange, but I ignored it. However, when the busboy
brought out water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt
pocket. I then looked around the room and saw that all the waitpersons had
a spoon in their pocket. When the waiter came back to check on our order I
asked: ”Why the spoon? Well, he explained, the restaurant’s
owners hired Andersen Consulting, experts in efficiency, in order to
revamp all our processes. After several months of statistical analysis,
they concluded that customers drop their spoons 73.84% more often than any
other utensil. This represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons
per table per hour.

If our personnel are prepared to deal with that
contingency, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and
save 1.5 man-hours per shift.” As we finished talking, a metallic sound
was heard from behind me. Quickly, the waiter replaced the dropped spoon
with the one in his pocket and said: I’ll get another spoon next time I
go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now. I
was rather impressed. The waiter continued taking our order and while my
guests ordered, I continued to look around.

I then noticed that there was
a very thin string hanging out of the waiter’s fly. Looking around, I
noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their fly.
My curiosity got the better of me and before he walked off, I asked the
waiter: Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right
there? Oh, certainly! he answered, lowering his voice. Not
everyone is as observant as you. That consulting firm I mentioned, also
found out that we can save time in the restroom. How so? See, he
continued, by tying this string to the tip of …you know… we can pull
it out over the urinal without touching it and that way eliminate the need
to wash the hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent, Okay,
that makes sense, but… if the string helps you get it out, how do you
put it back in? Well, he whispered, lowering his voice even further,
I don’t know about the others, but I use the spoon.